Mike T

It's a good bridge that keeps the trains dry as they go across the river. I often sit in the park and try to use my mind to make the trains go backwards. It worked the one time but the guy on the train yelled at me so I had to stop.

It's poorly defined and hard to see. I tried to go across it and fell off into the river. Fortunately I landed in the shallow section, but still. I went back to complain to the bridge's manager and he just flicked cigarette ash at me. I emailed the city and they just rickrolled me.

I love reviewing strip malls. Why wouldn't a strip mall need a separate review? I mean, I have such low expectations and who the hell says "I'm not going to that store? The parking lot is substandard!"